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Fiction Friday. A Prologue Snippet.

This is an excerpt from some Fiction that I am currently working on. 

Every morning as dawn broke the Church doors would unlock and Amy would take a walk in and around the church grounds; she’d look at the headstones, there were a few new ones; but mainly old and now lost and forgotten. Many thoughts crossed her mind,  even those of wonder –  whether this would soon become her final resting place; wondering if she would even get a headstone and if her unborn baby would be with her.    Amy had even envisaged a burial plot; under a pretty little tree that she imagined would blossom during the summer months; sprinkling petals over her abandoned grave in years to come.

She continued to gently walk aimlessly.   She began to talk a little to her delicate bulging stomach, this would be the only conversation she would have. A cold chill swirled around her;  it was then she decided to go back inside the church; where once again the doors would close magically behind her.

The frail old woman hurriedly approached her; where she became forceful with Amy; almost seemed frustrated with her. Forcefully holding her by the arms while she placed her hand hard onto Amy’s growing stomach, she muttered something quickly and quietly; which sounded like a chant or a spell; willing the birth of the unborn baby quicker.   She ripped her hand away. Amy stepped away quickly; wrapping her arms around her stomach for protection for her unborn child. Frowning at the woman; confused by her new hostile behaviour.

Outside, a blizzard was looming; heavy snow hit the stained glass windows of the church, Amy silently but quickly made her way to the big Oak doors, they hadn’t yet been bolted from her walk outside; she had only assumed she had now outstayed her welcome with Cora the person she had looked to as an angel that had taken care of her these last weeks.   But as she neared them the bolts pulled themselves across to lock the door.   Amy hadn’t noticed that the elderly woman was right behind her; ready to pull Amy away from the door, with some surprising force, to stop the teen from escaping.

She pushed Amy to the floor.   Shocked and frightened she slowly got to her feet; looked at her attacker then looked around. She was looking for some kind of exit and she noticed a little oak door to the side of her; maybe this could be her door…   She pushed, pulled, even kicked it; while tugged at the dirty brass doorknob; with no movement; it was very old and locked.    Cora followed the 14-year old’s every move, every footstep-like a shadow.  She again grabbed Amy with force by her arm.

Pulling her close, she placed her hand tightly onto Amy’s large pregnant stomach; she let out a horrified and painful gasp while tearing herself away from the cold elderly hands, replacing them with her own warm hands, protecting her unborn child.  Cora disappeared.

Amy took the opportunity to try and escape again through the old side door, “Surely there is a way to get out of here?” She muttered to herself. Amy once again kicked and punched the door.  She could see movement out of the corner of her eye, Amy turned to see the not so frail Cora slowly walking effortlessly towards her – as if she was gliding- carrying something in her arms.

Amy began to panic throwing bibles, prayer mats and iron candlestick holders at the woman; all of which missed her.  When Amy failed to hit the woman in self-defence, she began throwing the objects at the ancient church stained glass windows in the hope it could be her escape route; or the very least a passerby would hear. She finally smashed a window; one of which had the beautiful Virgin Mary mastered in to.  This angered the woman; she quickened her pace toward the terrified pregnant girl.

The elderly woman carried a bowl of warm water and fabric – possibly old curtains.  Amy concentrated harder on her escape she wasn’t quite tall enough to reach the window she had smashed; for a moment she couldn’t see Cora. The hood of her cloak now rested on her shoulders. Thick, unkempt, white hair down to her shoulder blades.

Cora was able to creep right up behind Amy, pulling her with force off the pew she was standing on to attempt her escape; she hit the floor, hard.  Cora grabbed Amy by a handful of hair; dragging her whilst she kicked. Cora came across a frail, elderly lady; but the truth was she had utter strength behind her. Amy yelled in pain toward the open space at the altar.

Amy silenced herself with fear, now lying on the cold stone floor, too scared to move.  Cora stood over her as she forcefully pulled Amy’s legs to buckle beneath her.  Amy attempted to stop her by kicking which only made Cora angry; making the grip tighter, with that unbelievable strength.  With her long thin pointy fingers, she placed them deep beneath Amy’s tatty long skirt…

It all happened so fast; Cora stood up and took a step back watching as pain ripped through Amy’s tiny teenage body.  Water surrounded the girl making it too slippery for her to stand.  There were waves of pain which paralysed her; all the while she still tried to protect her unborn baby with nothing but just her arms.  Amy thoughts were only to her death, she knew she was about to die, no one would know or even care. Not even her family, she was dead to them, the moment she discovered her pregnancy.  She tried to stand, but could only kneel; she was desperate for the pain to disappear.  Cora continued to stand close, arms folded with no emotion or word to say; she pulled Amy to her feet dragging her a short space to the font; where she submerged the girl’s head into the clear water…


Source: Tumblr

National Kiss A Ginger Day

Apparently, it would seem this is a thing, it is a day in January to “celebrate gingers”.
I was horribly teased throughout my whole school life, repeatedly called carrot top, or ginger (pronounced with a hard G). People didn’t have a nice thing to say about it.
Even my Mum “joked” that she asked the nurses if I was hers because I am ginger.
It was bloody horrible. I spent so long growing up wondering what the hell I had done wrong, why I was so hated, why my hair colour was so disgusting – or at least that was how I felt because of how much I was teased.

It does set you up, forever, even friends had a go, of course looking back, they weren’t really friends to be doing that.
People had a fascination with wanting to know if we had ginger pubes (or ginger bollocks if you were a lad). But children, adults find it acceptable to ask because we’re ginger, in all fairness, it’s harassment, why people feel the need to know such personal things is beyond me.
I have never understood the ginger discrimination,

neither has anyone else ever had a valid reason to do so either.

“It’s different.”
“It’s ugly.”
“You’re disgusting.”
None of which are valid points to make another human being feel disgusting and unloved.

I don’t think society has changed, as far as I know, my children haven’t been bullied for their hair, which I’m glad about, but that could be because there are more in schools (we’re pretty damn hot).
But I do still hear adults make snide remarks about ginger hair, it only rubs off into the next generation. As someone who deals with baby loss families, I’ve even heard baby loss mums say about their own child “at least they weren’t ginger”. Very unpleasant.
It’s sad and bloody hurtful.

I may be oversensitive, overreacting, but when you have had a lifetime of teasing because of your hair colour, it gives you every right to be sensitive; but at the same time, it gives me the right to stand up for myself.

I’m a redhead, and now I love it, I love it more because all of my children have red hair, although the daughter we lost had strawberry blonde.
National Kiss a Ginger Day? Remember that there could be a redhead out there being teased, being forced to be kissed by some bully because to them it’s funny.

There is nothing wrong with having ginger hair-nothing. The only people who are wrong are those who ridicule others. That’s ugly.

Hot Red Heads

Kevin McKidd
Florence Welch
Ed Sheeran
Prince Harry
Tim Minchin
Kate Walsh
Sarah Drew

So many more!

Facebook Couple

He is my Soul Mate.


I am not “A ginger”. I am a person.

We are bloody awesome!!

The Red Head Diaries

The Red Head Diaries – Making The Switch

Making the Switch

After lots of to-ing and fro-ing, I have made the decision to switch my blog to self hosted. In all fairness I probably should have made the switch sooner; I should really take my love for writing and do something properly with it. Embrace it more, hopefully grasp some opportunities which may arise. Even if they don’t; well I’ll still love writing.

I am really looking forward to this next chapter, I’ve some subjects I have in mind for the blog as well as book planning in the mix too, I say planning I am already a percentage through book one and three on a series I am working on, plus a stand alone fiction too.

Approach with caution

The switch has been a complete headache, most certainly not for the faint hearted and definitely should NOT be attempted whilst suffering with PMT or dieting (chocolate is a must for switching – or maybe even alcohol). I am pretty sure the company I have chosen to self host with also need a touch of alcohol after speaking to me at least five times in the space of 24 hours. They probably even took bets on how long it would take me to contact them again, or screw up; There were moments of long pause between chats, I could picture them laughing at the screen.

But still it is hopefully done, I am relieved they were patient with me.

I am sure there are still adjustments to be made…please point me in the right direction; I have learned so much within the switching process, that I can’t say how I ever managed before – it has certainly been an eye opener. There were many, many times I asked my husband, why the hell am I doing this? Is it really worth it?

I guess only time will tell.

Thank you so much for your patience with all the swapping around..writing service will resume soon.

The Red Head Diaries Logo

The Red Head Diaries


Why Do I Blog?

Sometimes I have absolutely no idea why. More often or not I am not even sure if they’re ever being read.


I began my internet blogging journey five years ago writing about the start of my pregnancy after the loss of Melody. I’d already written using pen and paper Melody’s pregnancy, birth and life. I had spent so much time behind a computer screen speaking to people on forums and Facebook groups, it felt at the time like an extension, or at least something to compliment what I was already in discussions about.

Having a pregnancy after the loss of an infant was terrifying, coupled with HG made everything so isolating, which left me alone. Due to the pregnancy being so close to the loss of Melody my words of terror during pregnancy actually turned into words about the grief for her.

October 2012 I took part in my very first grief project (Capture Your Grief); it was here I fell in love with the idea of documenting my relationship with grief, living with it. I knew then it was something I needed to do, whether it was read by people, which was a different matter, if the posts were read then even better. For me it meant that I was hopefully helping someone, whether they had their own grief, or just struggled to understand mine.

For a long time I focused solely on this blog, it became my niche, I felt confident about talking about her, it has helped me so much.


I made a decision to share family life too, as a way of making memories, and I guess to compliment Melody and Me in a way that parenting after loss is very, very different to that of how parenting was before.

I love, love writing, and most of the time it is probably crap, sometimes I try to be funny…I’m not.

I just would like to be read, the blogging community is huge, and to be a small part of that is great, I do know I have a lot more to learn and a lot of confidence building.

Some things will be changing (again – sorry) over the next couple of months, but that is simply because I really am learning on the job, which is what I hope this will become one day.


Thank you for sticking by my month of prompts; although I did schedule some of them ahead of the days, I have enjoyed taking part.

I hope you have enjoyed reading them, and getting to know your author that little bit more.

Maybe I will do another soon.


Julz – The Red Head Diaries


I do have some very exciting news coming in the Next 24 hours for both of these blogs. I am just hoping I have made the right decision… Eek!

Instagram @theredhead_diaries

Twitter @theredhead35

And Facebook The Read Head Diaries – Blogs



What is in my Messy Cupboard?

I have already mentioned my vast collection of reusable bags, but I also have a slight stationery addiction too.

There are many notebooks and bits of paper in here, full of stories and ideas which I am working on.

I like to write my very first drafts of things I write with old fashioned pen and paper, I am not overly sure why; maybe it is because I can sometimes get more done, especially with an incredibly clingy toddler, or in the car when Mr Red is driving.


I think I buy a new notebook at every opportunity I can, I also receive them often too, each one has its own topic, easy for me to remember where and what I have written, far easier to get my head around than trying to work out spreadsheets.

A couple of the books have endless random lists. Does anyone else love list writing? I’m actually at a loss as I have no lists to compile at the moment.

As well as many pieces of written work, I have charity work things in there too.

Luckily the doors are fairly stiff so the youngest one can’t open it easily.


The Red Head Diaries.


Blogs I Read

I try and read as many as I can, particularly as a blogger I like mine to be appreciated too.

There are a few new ones which I am enjoying; I say new, I mean new to me.

I’m not sure if I can include these as I contribute, but as I am not alone in contributing to them, I will add them.

Loss Through The Looking Glass, put together by some incredible women.

Still Standing Magazine, I have been in awe of the articles that have appeared over the years, they have helped me so much.

The Hairy Dadders

Life by The Dreams

Whinge Whinge Wine

Somewhere Over the Rainbow

Write like No-one’s Watching


Just to name a few.

I love reading blogs, I am maybe a little nosey. But often I really am in awe of how people manage to maintain such popular blogs, and keep tidy houses!!

I am shit at planning, and parenting at times…I really should keep to set times for things, but I over flow then time runs away with me.

One Day I will get better organised.

But for now I will carry on enjoying both reading and writing.


The Red Head Diaries


Favourite Childhood Books

My Dad was a big reader, and tried his best to get us to love them too, however it wasn’t until I reached adulthood did I find my real love of books.

I couldn’t pick just one favourite.

One of my favourites was The Hodgeheg by Dick King Smith, it is about a Hedgehog family’s adventures in crossing the road, anyone who knows me, will know I love hedgehogs.

Another is Alice In Wonderland

The adventures, the mysteries this book takes you. So many different characters, worlds within worlds, I personally think it is an incredibly unique book; it is probably why it is so well loved.

The Christmas Carol, I have no idea why I love this book so much, it fascinates me all the different film versions of the book too. I try and encourage my children to read this book, although Harry Potter and The Hobbit are heavily encouraged here too.

Books, are wonderful to get lost in, to take your mind off real life troubles.

The Red Head Diaries


The Red Head Diaries

Saal Digital UK Photo Book 

​I love taking photos; I take them at every possible opportunity. For me it is important to make memories, but to also make them last. In a digital world it can often make us forget to take the hundreds of photos from USB sticks, our phones, our flash drives. Placed into thousands of folders on screens rather than in shoe boxes or albums. It is always on one of my “to do lists”, to print and sort out the literal thousands of photos I have stuck in my many devices. But of course never gets done.

I have just recently been given the opportunity to review a Photo book, from Saal Digital UK. I have brought a couple of photo books in the past, they have been okay – pretty run of the mill; so I wasn’t entirely sure on what to expect when my new photo book arrived.

I have been really pleasantly surprised by this photo book, if I am honest I wish now I had chosen “better” photos, but I love them all the same, I can’t wait to use these books for some of my landscape photos.

I really love what I have received, and have been showing it off to anyone who will listen and will be back to purchase another, it’ll certainly make the memories a lot easier to look through.

The Saal Digital UK and software is really easy to use, with clear easy to follow instructions (which make me very happy).

They do a selection of products from prints to Calendars.

There are a variety of choices for the photo books including hard covers, booklets with spiral binding and soft covers.

My Book is made up of glossy texture, with an unpadded glossy cover 15×21 with 28 pages.

Would I recommend Saal Digital UK?

Yes definitely. There was a really quick turnover from ordering to it reaching me, which is brilliant for last minute shoppers. Thank you for such a great experience.


The Best Thing to Happen This Year

We still have a few months to go until 2017 ends. The year has moved by so quickly it’s hard to pin point what has been the best.
I believe the best is yet to come.
I think one of the biggest highlights for me is becoming a contributor to an online magazine in which I’ve spent the past five years reading, and now I’m writing for them.
There’s a huge team, I feel incredibly honoured to be part of such a wonderful thing.
I’ve some exciting things coming up with The Red Head Diaries blog.
There was the charity barn dance which was great fun, I swore I wouldn’t fundraise again, but then the fun day happened.

Which was amazing, the day went incredibly well, we made £545 to split between two charities, we’re really pleased with what we achieved.

The day went as smoothly as it could, even with the many tears.
We have had a camping trip to the Cotswolds – Chipping Norton, it was so lovely to get away, we’ve planned at least two for next year.
So, whilst I can’t pick one thing, there’s still time


Ten Favourite Foods

Considering I am on a diet, I really shouldn’t be thinking on my favourite foods.

When I was pregnant with my last baby, I was down to eating 2-3 foods for the whole of my pregnancy, that has put me off a lot of foods too.

Big fan of crap food, hence why I am now attempting to diet my way through life.

But if I could have anything.

My ten favourite foods would be.

  1. Scones,
  2. Avocado Salad
  3. Bangers and Mash
  4. Jacket potato with Cheese and Beans
  5. Mackon Chicken with Coconut Rice
  6. Pork and Rice (Hairy dieters recipe)
  7. Lidl Blueberry Muffins
  8. Gnocchi
  9. Strawberries
  10. Pesto and pasta.


Plenty of rubbish, but some good things too.

What are you loving right now?


The Red Head Diaries