Tag Archives: cheerful list


My Cheerful List #27 Mother’s Day

Welcome back to My Cheerful Post. A place to share cheerful moments which have made us smile during the week. In times where it seems impossible, it can be helpful to find something, no matter how small that moment is. Here is week 27.



This week, I have been hit yet again with another cold, pains, and tiredness – just feeling pretty shitty if I am honest. I am getting pretty fed up with virtually having no energy to do anything. The youngest doesn’t sleep particularly well; she has never slept through the night. I guess it takes its toll. It wasn’t until I had the baby loss group that someone suggested that maybe it is my body reacting to the time of year. I am keeping myself busy, more so than other years – not intentional, at least I don’t think. Maybe it is. This time of year is bloody shitty, while I share old photos an reminders and try to be upbeat about it; maybe protecting my listeners – I don’t know. But I do feel shitty, and it does bloody hurt knowing that this time six years ago I wasn’t a bereaved mum.


Little Daffodils

On the first Tuesday of each month is our lovely pregnancy and infant loss support group; this week it was exactly that. It is such a lovely, supportive group; it is definitely a space I need right now. One of the members brought the group a candle plate with daffodils on, and she brought me a daffodil tea light holder, they are absolutely beautiful. Our local florist also dropped in a little surprise, left us some tiny daffodils for each member to take home as it is nearing Mother’s Day – really thoughtful.



A couple of weeks ago there was a post by a UK charity on Facebook about loss. I commented about the lack of resources there are for babies who live and then die. I was then left an email; so I took the plunge and wrote an email, just to share a bit of our experience in the hope they could use it to pass it on. The first reply was for me to help tweak their information about our type of loss; which I felt so pleased about. As if that wasn’t enough I was then passed on to someone else, who wants to do more – which has lead me to be invited to London to help further with a baby loss project they are putting together.

It has been such an exciting thing, and I feel like I am being properly listened to about changing the way support and resources are issued; all will be revealed in due course.


Mother’s Day

I have had such a wonderful day, it is always bittersweet being minus a daughter – I am so showered with love I haven’t been able to think too much today. A trip to Bristol and of course their huge Primark! Best shop – ever!

My gifts from my lovely family are…

A Mini Pukka Pad

Yoga Mat

A large amount of sticky notes


Reflection book – What if Mulan had to travel to the Underworld

A Wand pen

The Greatest Showman Soundtrack

You’re never weird on the internet book by Felicia Day

A pedal machine

Several cards, including handmade ones

Finally a keyring with our youngest daughter’s thumb print in it – so bloody cute!!


Hope your days have been kind.


Mother's Day





My Cheerful List #25

Welcome back to My Cheerful List. A chance to share with you something which has made me cheerful during the week, whether it be large or small, it is important to find something good even when it feels impossible. Thank you for joining me! We have reached week 25!

Back to School and Work

After a lovely week off it was back to routine, longing for the next set of holidays, five weeks and counting until the next. We managed to return to that routine swiftly; it has been a relatively quiet one.


Midweek Adventure

We met up with a friend as we do most Wednesdays, have done for a few years now – it is always lovely. This week we took the children to a soft play, we haven’t been for ages so it was nice for them to have a change of scenery, which they seemed to love every minute. We then had a wander around the shops and lunch it was lovely as always.


The Run Up

It is of course that lead up to our daughter’s un-birthday; a day of birth with no birthday person to celebrate it with. I really hate this part; it is difficult and really unpredictable. I can’t tell you how I will feel from one year to the next or from day to another. It is heavy and downright shit. Tomorrow should have been a little girl’s 6th birthday. I have had tears one day this week, moments where I was unsure of whether I would be able to compose myself for work or to breathe, but work grounded me, it gave me no time to think or let it consume me. I know it’ll be okay…but I also know it is perfectly okay not to be too.



We had planned a visit to the beach; but it is super cold out there, so imagined it would have been even colder by the sea, so we took a walk into town via seeing our little girl at the cemetery – we’re not sure we’re able to visit on her birthday due to work, and my older two are at their dad’s, but they wanted to visit her too. We walked rather than take the car, although very bitterly cold it was nice and dry.

A few weeks ago I decided to try decorating and hiding some rocks within our town, I had heard about it from a fellow blogger on her Facebook Page (Whinge Whinge Wine), and thought I would give it ago with a couple. Well today we took 35/40 rocks which we had all decorated and scattered them around several places – the children loved it and thought it was great fun.



Spending the rest of the weekend chilled, as I said before the run up is always so shit, and difficult. It is incredibly lonely at times; people don’t understand about our inability to just “move on”. I guess they are lucky.


I hope you have managed to find something to make you cheerful this week.

Here is my favourite post this week. Not Just for Girls.



My Cheerful List #24 Half Term.

Welcome back to My Cheerful List. February Half Term! A chance to share with you something which has made me cheerful during the week, whether it be large or small, it is important to find something good even when it feels impossible. Thank you for joining me! We have reached week 24!

February Half Term

This week off had become very welcomed, the children were beginning to get tired, catching any bugs going and just generally needed a break. We weren’t sure what the weather would be like, it really has been a little hit and miss; but it hasn’t been terrible.



We decided on a quiet day, my older two children were at their Dad’s; so we had snuggles at home. It was lovely not to be rushing around getting ready for work and school.



Pancake Day! We met up with a friend and her two girls; meeting at our local café to have pancakes there. They had a lot of energy between them so made to decision to take a walk at our local Nature Reserve. We’ve not been there for months it is still as lovely as ever. The girls and their friends fed the ducks, run around and burnt some energy. It was so lovely to be out. Then we had Pancakes in the evening, yummy.



The original plan was to meet with friends and visit one of our local National Trust properties, however Baby Red woke up and was incredibly clingy, which resulted in her vomiting not long after. Which meant no meeting with friends; after a sleep for a few hours she perked up but wasn’t right until much later in the day.

Wednesday was also Valentine’s Day, where my husband spoilt me as per usual; including my new Dobby mug. I am not a big fan of Valentine’s Day, so am not very good at enjoying it. Here’s why. It took me many years to like it even a little bit again. It’ll always be different.



Another quiet day, I had a headache on and off, desperately hoping it wouldn’t turn into anything to put off plans for the end of the week. We attempted to sort things in the house too ready for decorating and new beds.



Half Term

The weather was actually nice again, cold but not raining! So, we took a visit to the Nature Reserve again, this time including my older two as well. We live really close to it – we’re really lucky. It was such a lovely walk, the children enjoyed it. Fresh air makes everything seem better. Two of them had majorette training in the evening, really proud of them all to be continuing with this hobby, my son is on Panto break for a few weeks, so will return to training soon.

Little Red has found a new love in majorettes; she’s been doing it since she was three and competed once or twice that first year; then went on to have a break due to starting school and not sleeping. She really missed it, and figured she won’t sleep no matter what we do (it is getting better!), we let her re-join. Slow start but she absolutely loves it!



A long-awaited trip to our local theme park – Crealy! They had a special half term offer of £10 a person; we took advantage of it and went with friends – new friends. It was a really lovely day; I hadn’t been in many years, my husband and our two younger girls have never been; my older two go regularly. So many rides, so much to do and see – we didn’t see or use it all due to time. We would definitely recommend a second visit. Crealy offers a free 6-day return if people are interested in going back again, ideal if used at the beginning of a half term.



Today we are having a quiet day! Little Red is playing on the Xbox; baby Red is ‘taking notes’. I am working up to finishing the first draft of a book which I am writing. I have procrastinated far too long! This book is actually book two of a series of children’s books that I have been playing about with; I had started this one through the annual event Nanowrimo – November’s National Writing a Novel Month. I had done a big chunk of it, and then I didn’t finish it. Then I will attempt to finish the first one.


Here is my flash fiction post from Friday, I hope you enjoy it – Don’t Touch Me.

Not long until the next half term, two weeks at Easter.





My Cheerful List #23


Welcome back to My Cheerful List. A chance to share with you something which has made me cheerful during the week, whether it be large or small, it is important to find something good even when it feels impossible. Thank you for joining me! We have reached week 22!


Support Group

Just under two years ago, I took the plunge and set up a face to face support group for pregnancy and infant loss; it has been a slow start, and at times I wondered what I was doing. But more recently people have been coming and I am really proud of what it is achieving. In a selfish point of view has made me feel less alone. I am so pleased I didn’t give it up. I have so much more I want to do, but it really is a case of one very slow step at a time; with a hint of frustration of not getting the things I want to get done quicker! Overactive mind I guess. Any, I am so proud of this little group.



This month’s group I invited a local businesswoman, she does embroidery amongst other things. I asked her for a very special bear; one with our daughter’s name on. They’re so amazing; we will get one each for them all. They are incredibly soft too. Yes, we are very happy with our new special bear.

Mumble Memory Bear



The group – Little Daffodils I run was included in our local carnival grants, so I had to go and collect the cheque along with a cheque for the majorettes with some of the committee team. I hate public speaking, I get all shaky and stutter – it seems to NEVER get easier!! We did have a lovely time, and turned it into a bit of a social gathering too.


It was the majorette bingo this week, as always a lot of fun. We had a good team and my daughter even won some Quality Street sweets which she was super excited about.


Mum’s Cheerful Day Out

Every couple of months my friend and I go and spend a few hours together without the children. We went to a New to You Sale; we then went for a light lunch. It was just lovely, dare I say it a little too peaceful! I managed to get my almost 5 year old a bag full of dresses and my son an outfit for just under £20. Nothing wrong with them, just preloved, she certainly loves them.


What a better week, looking forward to the half term break now, will see what it’ll bring.

My Cheerful List

My Cheerful List #22. Darkness

The Red Head Diaries


Welcome back to My Cheerful List. A chance to share with you something which has made me cheerful during the week, whether it be large or small, it is important to find something good even when it feels impossible. Thank you for joining me! We have reached week 22!

I am a little late with this; in all honesty I was in two minds whether to do it at all. But I am here.


The weather has been so crap these last few weeks; any plans we make seem to be washed away. It has been incredibly hard again to find something cheerful in the days; it had become almost like living Groundhog Day. I got to the end of the week feeling incredibly drained, and felt like utter shit, exhausted mentally and physically. It has kind of hit me hard. I hate feeling this way. I have decided to lessen social media use; not be so hard on myself when I don’t write – with thoughts of nobody reads them anyway!! Ha! I will schedule ahead if I want to, but generally step away from technology for a while. I have hit breaking point. Of course I will have a read maybe once a day (I like the time hops, especially this time of year when the “Melody” posts appear. It had gotten too dark, I am struggling.



Of course to balance it out, I spent the weekend only turning on my data/Wi-Fi once a day – it was lovely, I saw more things, more of my children; but out the car window – and just relaxed without my phone in hand or to my face. I had spent so long using it as my support system, the people in my phone are amazing, but there came a point that it also makes you feel incredibly lonely too. It just felt so lovely to put the thing down, no blog, just notes for my books but that was it. People will just have to ask for my mobile number. I have been incredibly lucky to have two of my favourite (adult) ‘J’s pulling my chin up. They can always make me cheerful.


Cheerful Plans

I have made plans with a couple new school Mum friends for the half term, with maybe even an evening out too! The children are really excited; plus plans with another friend for our regular Saturday afternoon adventure.


Family time

As I said above we went out for the day on Saturday, only to the shops and a spot of naughty lunch; we’d planned the park but as always it was raining! Sunday my older two went to their dad’s, so we had a day at home watching Harry Potter; they’re all big fans, I managed to get little red her own cape, which she absolutely loves! Then in the evening we spent some time with my husband’s family. That was really lovely, needs to be done more often!


So, this is my cheerful list this week.

Just in case you missed other posts which went out this week, here they are!

Fiction Friday.

Can’t Look Away.


My Cheerful List #8

Welcome to My Cheerful List Week Eight. (Here is last week’s)I feel in hard times it is nice to try and find something that had made you smile in some way during the week. Even if it is only something very small.

Cheerful Half Term Week

We have been reasonably lucky with the weather this week. Although we didn’t do a great deal. I took the younger girls out for a McDonald’s Lunch, although the restaurant was busy, so we ate in the car. We paid a visit to The Range, as I wanted to get some advent candles I had seen advertised somewhere.


We always buy Melody an advent candle, usually one of the pillar types, but they take forever to burn down to the next day. So we thought we would give these ago. Worth a try.

Baby Lolly had the most epic of meltdowns – no pictures for that pleasurable experience. She has to be going through some hormonal crap right now, for the level of tantrum she had in Mothercare, lots of tuts I could hear, very much ignored! Little sausage. All because I wouldn’t let her her have the bracelets in which she had covered BOTH arms with, then she needed the pushchair that’s left randomly placed. No! So screaming, flailing arms commenced. Good job I bloody love her.


National Trust

We took a trip to Montecute House here in Somerset. It was such a lovely Autumnal Day. it was even almost warm. We had a lovely walk, the children burned off some energy; they said they really enjoyed themselves.



We brought Pumpkins this week, only at our local Aldi, the children had fun choosing them from the large cardboard box.

We don’t really do all the Halloween stuff, as our own little family; we’re not that bothered. I know the older two do things with their Dad, that’s great. But it isn’t for us. I have my own reasons. If any of them wanted to join in with the Halloween things then may be, but for now whilst the littlest girls, aren’t too bothered, and the older two have Halloween away from me this year. It isn’t something we’re worried about. They do like pumpkin carving though!


Lovely evening with friends at the end of the week. I just wish the half terms were longer. Not long now until the Christmas one. I can’t wait!

There is a new post this week on Melody and Me. Pop over and have a look if you haven’t seen it.

How has your week been? What has made you cheerful?

I’m trying to decide whether to make this a linky link. Let me know what you think?

I’ve felt a lot better this week, still bloody tired though.


My Cheerful List #7


I’ve really struggled this week. Unfortunately the Butterfly Awards really set me back a little with emotions, which I have explained here. I lost all writing motivation, I’ve gotten behind with posts I’ve just not been in a cheerful enough mood. Anxiety has really played a big part in my week.
I’m really lucky that I have my husband to release to, it has been the thoughts that parenting after a loss is actually really bloody difficult. I wish that I could blank and ignore things, but I can’t.

Irrational Panic.

I was miles away, barely any signal or WiFi. I’d been made aware of a situation, but I felt helpless. For a while I couldn’t physically speak to my children, cross ringing, poor signal; I knew they weren’t hurt or involved but I needed to speak to them.
It was horrible. I soon managed to speak to my friend, who’d said she had managed to take them to their destination. They were OK but tearful.
It’s played on me, that I wasn’t there for them for this moment to hug them, to reassure them. I’ve felt like I failed them. I’m grateful to my friend and the Majorettes to keeping them safe, but as a Mum I felt like I let them down.

I can’t explain

In a weird way (I can’t explain why, but I know that people who ‘know’ will understand) it took me back to the final 24 hours of our daughter’s life, we left her happy, she was OK and safe. Then we still lost her.
I’m not a control freak, but being so far away from them I just felt like I was out of control as a parent.
I’m very nervous about leaving them due to the above reasons.
But I’m thankful, very thankful that they were cared for and safe.
I know people will think I’m weird, but that for me is how my anxiety effects me sometimes. I bloody hate it.

It makes me feel selfish too. 


The situation brings me to praising the community in which the Majorettes and Carnival clubs are. To show our support to the very special family involved we decided to change our social media pictures to that of a sunflower with love. It went viral, it wasn’t something we ever imagined. Lovely to see people-strangers some of them come together. I’m proud that my children are part of such an amazing community, I feel privileged to be a committee member.

Cheerful List

I’ve managed to increase my hours at work which has made me really happy, so 4 out of 5 shifts, plus relief cleaning; it has been lovely to spend more time within the work force.


The weird weather we have had this week, the named storms ending the week but earlier on we we very lucky to have been able to see a RED sun. It was amazing to see, the skies were yellow, unfortunately my camera phone didn’t pick it up as well as I had hoped for; but it was stunning

No Friday antics this week…Need to use our imaginations I reckon!!

Final Carnival of the Season, it was lovely I could be there this week. It was lovely seeing everyone come together, wearing sunflowers, offering kind gestures.

My light up shoes were actually COMFORTABLE!!! Definitely something to be cheerful about.



I hope you have managed to find something cheerful, just a tiny thing.

One Day at A Time.

Much Love.



Part Six


My Cheerful List #6

Not a lot happened this week, I am sure my updates are getting duller.

Cheerful Number Six

Carnival week begin in our town this week, with the Fairground arriving too. I am shocked by how much the prices have raised. I remember (Gosh I will sound old) when cheap night at the fair was actually cheap. Rides were no more than £1. My eldest wanted to go with her friend so I took just her, my son didn’t want to go; I wasn’t going to force him.  The cheap rides are now £2.50-£3.00; which is a fair amount if you or your child wants to go on more than just one ride.

Still she had a wonderful time.


There was an advert on social media about a Friday 13th Flash Day at a tattoo studio in the next town. Where they had set designs for £13 each.  I hadn’t had a tattoo for ages, I do love them I just can’t afford them, the best part was for all monies raised would go to charity – RSPCA, BiBiC and the one which swayed me – Towards Tomorrow Together. After majorette training myself, friend and two of her children (adults), raced to Taunton in the hope we’d get there before closing – we made it. Arriving at around 8pm, there was a room full of waiting people for their tattoos; with a few more turning up after us. One of my friend’s children unfortunately didn’t have the time, due to work.


But we were able to have ours done at about 12.30am. It was the most surreal experience to have a tattoo at that time of the night, but it was amazing; I am so please we stayed and had them done – only problem now, is that I want more. Soon maybe; thank you Indelible Ink

Butterfly Awards


Butterfly Awards arrived, we spent the night away; I was able to meet another fellow loss Mum who I had been speaking to since the beginning of her journey . I didn’t take home an award, but I wasn’t expecting to either. It was very nice to be away with my husband for the night, a very rare opportunity. The night set off some emotions I had forgotten I had, you can find out here how our evening went.

If you missed it here is #5

Thanks for reading My Cheerful List, what has made you cheerful this week?


My Cheerful List #5

Welcome to week five of my cheerful list. Where I find some things during the past week which has made me cheerful.


It has been quite busy, and I’ve not been entirely sure where this week has gone.Stepping forward with my blog work, I have some exciting things coming up, I am a little nervous about getting things done right to make the right impression, but it is nice and I am learning so much in the process. Blogging is (as I am finding out), is so much more than writing, point and shoot and getting attention. And there isn’t a lot of free things floating about; which isn’t what I am here for. I love writing and I just want to be read.

Full Days

Mini started full days this week, and they have been tough on her, yet she is still a shit sleeper… still waking to come into our bed, and no whilst she still needs us we won’t be placing her back…plus she screams rather loudly, do not want the whole house hold awake!


Lining myself up for an interview for extra work within my work setting, few extra hours in the hope that eventually hubby and I can role swap and he can be at home more. Mentally I need to keep busy, when I don’t do a lot my mind wanders, I over think then I am a wreck for days; it is not good.


Christmas shopping in Sidmouth with a friend, we have done this annually for the past few years, it is lovely. We have a nosey around the charity shops. My children (I think) are finished, apart from “main” presents. I have NEVER been this organised before. I have shopped throughout the year this year, have really enjoyed doing so, with the help of two easy to use apps (Play Store).


An evening out with friends. When I initially agreed to go and watch a show, I thought it would be a show to see my friend’s daughter in one of hers….NO! It was in deed to go and see Puppetry of the Penis. The show took place at The Octagon Theatre in Yeovil here in Somerset. I was a little unsure, but they are hilarious. These two guys, who literally make puppets out of their penises. Moving them in ways you have never seen, or imagined possible. Even without their penises these guys are hilarious, and are for audiences of both men and women, both were there in the audience. After the past few weeks I am so glad I went, nice to have a giggle. Then a McDonald’s afterwards.



Carnival night. The children had their next carnival in Ilminster in Somerset; they always love this one as a fair few of their friends go to watch. Their favourite is Chard, which is the following week. Best of all they came joint 1st! Amazing achievement.



I hope you have had a lovely week?

If you missed last week’s here is number four


My Cheerful List #1

I’m aiming to share a cheerful post each Sunday, with positive things from my week, whether it a big or a small thing.


We hit a couple of ‘firsts’ this week. It was the first week back at school for them all, although one only did two days, and another did half days.

First day of Primary School for the 4 year old, although only half days these next few weeks; she has certainly needed the start. So far she has loved every moment. I’ve been a little apprehensive, I now have to share her with teachers. Although I’ve already children at school, this time is so different. Co-parenting the older two and having only half the school runs it is hard to build up relationships with other parents. I’m not expecting to meet lots of new parents; I am shy when it comes to face to face meetings. But it will be lovely to feel part of the school run mum life.


Mini has rarely had any time away from us, at least not on a daily basis; she’s never been on days out with other people without us (apart from when a friend took her off our hands when I had Hyperemesis), so for this big (for Mama) leap to happen now, it has made me feel quite emotional this week.

I have been really struggling this week; for which I am so grateful to have such a wonderfully supportive husband. You’ve only had to say boo to me and I would have cried. I’m not really going to talk mental health here. This is my “happy” post.


Carnival season has begun, we had our first last night (9th September). They looked absolutely amazing. They have worked really hard too. Couldn’t be more prouder of my biggest and my boy. Mini, I think has seen what she is missing out on. This time last year she was a majorette; she had competed at 3 years old, she did the carnivals last year; but due to her lack of sleeping, she gets really grumpy at certain times of the day, which at the time included competition days; she would refuse to go onto the arena, so enough was enough. I felt embarrassed (although her trainer said there was no need to), she was becoming a little hard work; we decided to pull her out, at least until she begins to sleep at night, and settle into school.



This week in my blogging world; I’ve been a little overwhelmed by the switch; it stressed me out somewhat, which in term a great piece of writer’s block hit me around the head, I lost momentum. However due to the Duchess announcing her third pregnancy – her third Hyperemesis pregnancy it lead me to reviving old post, working with the charity PSS, and bagging myself an interview with a journalist for a magazine. Raising awareness for Hyperemesis is so important, and really should not be left to only when someone of importance gets it. It isn’t how it works. Normal, everyday people suffer, we suffer terribly.

Then there is the Butterfly Awards voting links have now gone live. It is such an honour to be part of such an amazing event, but very scary. I question myself a lot about whether I am really good enough. I have a lot of self doubt. But really I shouldn’t.

Something I definitely need to work on.

Hope your week has been good.


The Red Head Diaries